Monday, February 02, 2009

Phelps Congratulates Cardinals On Super Bowl Win

Olympic Champ
Praises Doritos Ad

I didn't get to see the awesome moment when the Cardinals actually won, but I'm sure that was bodacious ...


Olympic champion Michael Phelps weighed in today on last night's Super Bowl, congratulating the Arizona Cardinals on their "awesome victory."

"The Cardinals really tore it up last night," said Mr. Phelps, who said he saw almost the entire game until he got "a wicked attack of the munchies" late in the fourth quarter.

"Maybe it was the Doritos commercial, I don't know, but suddenly I got unbelievably hungry," said Mr. Phelps, giggling uncontrollably. "I was like, man, I have got to get me some Doritos, stat!"

Mr. Phelps said that once he got to his kitchen, he became distracted when he noticed that his hand appeared to be growing.

"I must have been staring at my hand for an hour," he said. "It was kind of fascinating."

The Olympian said that by the time he returned from the kitchen, the game was already over, "so I didn't get to see the awesome moment when the Cardinals actually won, but I'm sure that was bodacious."

Mr. Phelps said he celebrated the Cardinals' victory by eating four bags of Doritos and swimming a victory lap on his living room rug.

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  • 1 comment:

    dickcaveat said...

    excellent piece.
    what has gone unsaid is that mr. phelps remains a role model -- despite the staggering hypocrisy surrounding his event with the bong.
    why is marijuana illegel?
    because the likes of Pfizer et al. would lose billions if folks could fire up a doobie whenever they couldn't sleep, had lost their appetite or just wanted to mellow out -- etc.
    this, of course, would have a ripple effect throughout the economy, beginning with police arrests. what bust is easier than popping pot heads, and why would any pd want to lose that conviction rate?
    from pot smaoking to religion to war, it's all economics.
    andy's pal ed